April 26, 2018

The power of two-A call to service

I ran across this passage from Ecclesiastes 4 today: “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend will help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, the will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of 3 strands is not quickly broken.”


two heads are better than one

two heads are better than one (Photo credit: massdistraction)


The verse talks about principles of how we are to relate to each other. What has happened to our relationships in the fast-paced life that we live in? In previous generations, we learned our life work or craft from someone who had the necessary knowledge and then passed it on to us. It was common to have mentors as we were taught valuable skills. I grew up on a farm, and I worked along side my father, learning how to drive a tractor, repair machinery, tend to the crops, etc. In today’s environment, most parents work outside of the home, and this important tradition of mentoring has mostly been forgotten. Instead society tells us we must operate on our own, to do our own thing. Unfortionately this practice leaves us with little provision for learning the skills that were once passed on for generations before us. As a result we have lost the unique empowerment that can be received when we work alongside someone else.


Also, tonight I attended my bible study on Christian vocation. Our modern “society” tells us to pander to our feelings, wants, get “stuff, do whatever makes us feel good. The result is a total society with extreme selfishness, and just looking out for No 1. This isn’t a healthy way of living, and certainly is not what God has planned for us. Rather we are given natural and spiritual gifts by God that are to be used to serve our neighbor, attend to his or her physical and spiritual needs. The Bible instructs us “to love our neighbor as ourself”.



So what does this have to do with dialogue E-journaling? It means that to survive and to thrive on this earth, we need healthy relationships with others, in particularly 2 or 3 people who have our back, as the Ecclesiastes passage states. No one achieves any kind of success in any area of life ALONE. Every successful and happy person has sought the advice and encouragement of others. Modern society has lied to us, that we are to only look out for No. 1. It won’t work going it alone, never has, never will.


So, as you consider selecting your “buddy coach”, someone who will encourage you, comfort you, listen to you, yes, even serve you, think of developing a different kind of friendship. Consider a friendship based on service to the other, not for what you can get out of him/her, but how you can serve them. You will be amazed that as you serve them, the joy and satisfaction that will come back to you.



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How do I find a Dialogue E-journaling Partner?

In the previous post I described a new kind of friend as being similiar to a “buddy coach” as described by Amanda Rankin in her book. So, how do you go about finding such a person?


“YOU GOTTA GROW BUDDY” – NARA – 516225 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Since the dialogue e-journaling process depends on the use of the internet, this person would need to be one that is connected and actively utilizes emails, texting, smartphone apps, etc. Almost all “boomers” are connected, so you should have a wide range of prospects to choose from. Some suggestions Amanda has on choosing a buddy coach in her book, “Buddy Coaching” include:

1. Try to choose a person who has a personality to compliment each other. You don’t need the same personality type, although Amanda does suggest taking a short personality profile, so you both understand your personality styles, so as to know how to interact with each other. The principle here is to take the partner’s personality into consideration and give them the kind of attention they need, not what you want.

2. If you want to interact, GROW, and assist each other, you might want to choose someone who is in a similiar stage of life, ie, perhaps a fellow “boomer”, or someone who is struggling with a common life issue, such as retirement, serious illness, etc. Also common interests would assist in relating to each other.

3. As a Christian, an important criteria for me is to find someone who I can exchange prayer requests with, and with whom I  can have spiritual discussions. So, if that is your desire, pray that God would direct you to the right person.

4. Consider who you would like to develop a stronger and deeper relationship with. Remember, you will be developing an accountability partnership with this person, so each of you will have to be willing to invest time and energy in the other.

So, in summary, think of a person you would want to “grow with”, to grow in fun, friendship and fulfillment.


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